The Daily UbuntuThread 05 · War and Reconciliation · September 29, 2026
Forgiving without forgetting
Forgiveness erases neither the wrong nor the memory. Where it has taken root, the truth first had to be told.
1 · The scene
Who decides what is neutral? Often, those for whom the system already works.
In my notebook I wrote: "neutrality" is never entirely neutral. It protects what is already in place and gives the illusion of impartiality while injustice goes on.
Ubuntu whispers: silence is not an absence, it is a position. Today I understand that true humanity is not found in neutrality, but in the courage to take the side of dignity.
Original vignette
2 · The documented case
Forgiveness, a seed of Ubuntu
To forgive is not to excuse the inexcusable or to act as if nothing had happened. Desmond Tutu, who led South Africa's Truth and Reconciliation Commission, recalled that anger and even hatred are part of being human. He added that forgiveness requires the perpetrator to acknowledge the offence. But the one who forgives stops being chained to the one who wounded them.
This idea found a place in a legal text. South Africa's interim Constitution, concluded on November 18, 1993, ends with a section on national unity and reconciliation. It sets understanding against vengeance, reparation against retaliation, ubuntu against victimization. The same text provides for amnesty for acts associated with political objectives committed during the conflicts of the past.
In Rwanda, the gacaca courts, from the Kinyarwanda word for the grass where the community gathered, followed a different path. The accused were encouraged to confess in exchange for a reduced sentence; victims were encouraged to forgive. Community service or reparations could accompany the sentence, to ease the return to the community.
In both cases, forgiveness did not come before the truth: it came after the truth had been told. Ubuntu shows why. If a person is a person through others, the wound damages both, and revenge repairs no one. Forgiveness can never be demanded of those who were hurt. But those who acknowledge the wrong can make it possible.
3 · The voice
“Forgiving is not just being altruistic. It is the best form of self-interest.”
“a need for ubuntu but not for victimisation”
4 · The question
Around you, what would need to be said, acknowledged or repaired for forgiveness simply to become possible, without ever being demanded?
Sources
- The Forgiveness Project, "Desmond Tutu," page updated in 2021. www.theforgivenessproject.com
- America Magazine, review of No Future Without Forgiveness, March 18, 2000. www.americamagazine.org
- Nelson Mandela Foundation (O'Malley archives), interim Constitution, "National Unity and Reconciliation," 1993. omalley.nelsonmandela.org
- ASIL Insights, S. E. Powers, "Rwanda's Gacaca Courts: Implications for International Criminal Law and Transitional Justice," June 23, 2011. www.asil.org
- Department of Justice of South Africa, Truth and Reconciliation Commission. www.justice.gov.za
Every figure on this page links to a verifiable public source.
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